My eyes are convinced that somethings wrong. My rods and cones have not been working. It’s as if I’ve lost my colour vision. The world is dismal shades of dark and grey. I’m not a doctor, so I’ll make up something nerdy to describe my affliction, what I’ve come up with is ‘Wrong Country Syndrome’….WCS for short. For the past year I have been living in the incandescent sunshine of SE Asia where light is represented on the day glow end of the spectrum and the colour of everything is bright bright bright !! I have come to the west coast of Canada where sunshine is weak and rare and shines with less intensity than a 25 watt bulb. Another problem I have been experiencing is the frightful cold, it’s frightfully cold all the time, day or night. I’m going to refer to this as ‘It’s Too Freaking Cold For Me To Be Here For Long Syndrome’…..ITFCFMTBHFLS for short. OK , not very scientific but I am a travel writer and not a scientist.
This is what I get for sending my son to a Canadian university. Mea Culpa…I knew I was going to have to come here for the Convocation at some point. I’d forgotten how crappy the weather is in Canada, especially the super dreary super soggy west coast. It was way better and way easier when I was sending him an airline ticket that I’d bought on travel miles points and having him come to stay with me in Bangkok. I know he liked that too, his FaceBook page shows him crashing motorcycles and spitting fire on Koh Phang Ngan…..seemingly having a great time…..on Dad’s dime……but now the university wants to have a party….weeehooooo……in Canada….where the sun never shines…..and it’s freezing cold……. yay !!
I’m going to pretend I’m somewhere else while the weather is as ugly as it is. I’m going to disappear in my work and pretend the world outside has gone away. This seems to be the Vancouver thing to do anyway…..you never see anyone out on the street….unless those shapeless bundles of rag are people. I’ll think good thoughts until I get to go home…which to me is any where between the tropics of Capricorn and Cancer. Here is my new wallpaper….I have turned my writing desk around to face blank paint…..some shade of beige….which is way better than what’s happening outside.